It's too loud, I can't hear my heart.
I feel like a yo-yo - up, down, up and down again.
Every day it's back to square one and I just can't find the energy to change.
A glimmer of inspiration, a flash of hope, but nothing more.
It's gone too easy.
And I'm left,
Alone.
I want to be an adventurer but I don't know what my dreams are.
How am I supposed to carve my own future when I can't get my head around the present?
You are all too kind to me.
But I don't know how to go on.
Have you ever caught yourself hoping, every time you walk into the road, that a car, or better still, a truck, will come around the bend too fast for you to have seen it? A tragic accident to fix your scattered soul. I don't want to die, I just don't know how to live.
yes! or perhaps the railings will break and i will fall down into the river below. hearning how to live can only take time i imagine.
ReplyDeletewhat is your passion?
you're sad still my dear. Try to concentrate on the good things you have right now. I've experienced that too feeling like everything in my life is a mess but then I realized feeling that way will lead me nowhere so I tried to change my perspective. May you find you're happiness really soon.
ReplyDelete"How am I supposed to carve my own future when I can't get my head around the present?"
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness. I have felt that exactly!
I try not to think much about the future anymore. At first it was because my present was bad enough, but lately... I have felt a peace about my future. I have no plans, no direction. But I have family and friends who love me and God is still in His heaven. I will keep my eyes and mind open and trust that what needs to happen will happen. I'll be praying that you will find peace too. Nothing is worse than the feeling of suffocating before you even learn to breathe. <3
I don't want to die, I just don't know how to live.
ReplyDelete-- that statement is haunting me.. don't worry heather, you're not alone.. for countless moments in our lives, we feel that way.. just don't think too much about it. (;
simply lovely!!
ReplyDeleteSquare one is one of those that moves around. My dad told me the other day, he said you know Heather, you're often on your own planet and planets move in retrograde, and it looks like they're moving backwards, but they're not. They're making progress.
ReplyDeleteYou're in retrograde dear. You'll be alligned soon. <3
0.0 Me exactly *Cuddles*
ReplyDeleteI'm a total rock candy addict, too. One of the things that guts me the most about Christchurch falling down is that my favourite hand-made rock store probably no longer exists D:
I'm glad you liked the piggy. There will be more of the fiddly little bastards coming in future weeks. Keep your eyes peeled :p
Love you, Heather. I hope things improve over your way <3