Isn't it beautiful?
There are conditions to accepting the reward.
I must share 7 things about myself, and then pass it on to 10 others.
This I will do in good time.
But right now I am just far too sad to even contemplate it.
Sorry.
I am just so lonely.
Never alone.
Just ever so lonely.
I want to.
Break free.
Let me out.
Please.
Updated:
It's 6pm.
I need to be acCOUNTable.
I do not need to eat any more tonight.
Tomorrow I will eat 3 meals.
But I will stick to 800.
I will be healthy.
I hate bingeing.
I can't purge any more.
I don't know why.
I shouldn't anyway. I don't want to.
But I'm freaking out that it's all just going to stay in me.
I feel I need to.
I feel I need to share so I can stand through the pain.
Urrgh.
I hate it.
My whole world is the pain inside of me,
The best I can do is just get through the day.
When life before is only a memory,
I wonder why God lets me walk through this place.
And though I can't understand why this happened,
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how You brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold, purified through these flames...
I cling to Your promise, that there'll be a dawn...
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again...
Nice read. I liked.
ReplyDeleteoh my dear heather... this post just broke my heart... but i'm happy to read the last part... remember, dove, God will not give you anything you cannot handle. trust me. He knows you. and i came across this quote a while back "EVERYONE HAS A HAPPY ENDING, IF IT'S NOT HAPPY, THEN IT'S NOT THE END" do you believe this? i hope you do... if not, i will believe them for you.
ReplyDeletei hope you find the happiness, or a reason to smile even for a sec or two.
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3
ReplyDeleteThe fact you can't purge may be frustrating, but it's good. There are other more effective ways to get rid of calories anyways, like exercise.
ReplyDeleteAn you're not alone. You have us. <3
Stay strong.
My heart goes out to you.
ReplyDeleteI can feel all of its love and support seeping out of my chest and flying towards you.
Like a fire, I hope it keeps you warm.
Love Anafly
xxx
Don't feel lonely, even though sometimes you can't help it. You have more company than you think :)
ReplyDelete~Stephanie
Hi! came across your blog and found it beauitful...I can relate to your loneliness and hope it gets better doll
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling so sad. I'm afraid loneliness and sadness are all part of the human condition. I hope it passes soon and that you feel better. All my love. <3. XXX.
ReplyDelete