Walls.

I'm building them up again. There is no point in being weak when there is noone to share with. No need to be completely vulnerable again.
I spent two years unbuilding what was reformed over night.
I must be strong. I must embrace it.
This terror, surly it will pass?
The fear of day break, of lonely hours.
It's just a phase.
Soon I can block it out too.
I'm grasping at the weak ties of friendship, torn between bridge building and swimming.
See the river, it already took my damn, maybe it's meant to have me too.
But how can I go with the flow when I have so many responsibilities?
So many obligations, tying me to the bank.
I want to let go, but then what would I have? I would gain nothing yet let down everyone.
No, that I cannot do.
So I let myself be stretched.
Further and further.
One day I'll snap again.
I can't let myself get there - there's noone to pick up the pieces.
So I must paint my body with rubber; line the vortex of my soul with things stronger than myself.