We (I) spend too much time talking about things, whining, self depreciating.
I want to thank sweet pea for inspiring me to keep going right now.
I hit my head off rock bottom and I'm continuing to fall but do you know what? It's okay.
I'm going to accept it.
I need to look myself in the mirror and say, yes, you fucked up, now deal with it like an adult.
Tomorrow is Monday, a new day, a new week, a fresh start.
Monday will be a good day if we tell ourselves it will be.
I have been thinking about my faith recently, and how much I take it for granted.
Though I was baptised and became a Christian as an adult, it seems like forever ago that I was aware of the active choice this was. It's not the easy way out. It requires the strength to love the people who hurt me the most that seems beyond me at points. It also requires me to be able to forgive and love myself. That's the one I want to work on daily. I'm not entirely sure how yet. It's a work in progress.
All my thoughts entwine in my mind to produce a beautiful, complex highway of noise that fails to come across eloquently when I set about trying to pave them in words.
I missed your writing far too much, when I stopped coming online.
ReplyDeleteYou, are more wonderful than you'll ever realise.
So many of us are, on here.
I'm sorry for disappearing. I've been thinking of you, though. Hoping that you're okay.
I love you, dear.
x
"It requires the strength to love the people who hurt me the most that seems beyond me at points." glad to hear im not the only one who struggles with that. Much love. Jx
ReplyDelete"Let's stop talking about it"~Great mantra for the day. I notice I spend a lot of time with meaningless, repetitive talk and complaints. You're right that being a Christian is not the easy way out. It is, though, incredibly rewarding throughout the difficulties. :)
ReplyDeleteHeather, i love and miss you. And it feels wonderful hearing these words from you.
ReplyDeleteP.S. i reached this point too, today.
This is so amazing.
ReplyDeleteYou, are so amazing.
This post was a wake up call to me. I want to start fresh, too. I'm so proud of you, dear.
You're so beautiful and wonderful.
Keep your head held high.
I love you. <3
xx
Yes! Yes! Yes!! deal with it and move on. It might be hard, but what else can you do? You can only learn and live again. :)
ReplyDeleteLove the people that are difficult to love. They will realize life is love, and perhaps become lovable.
This made me smile. I love that you are becoming very very happy.
LOVE!
Definitely not just you, I spend more time than I should talking drivel and whining about stuff that doesn't matter, in the course of a lifetime.
ReplyDeleteI'll be praying for you on your journey. I guess you could say faith is the one thing whose rewards you'll reap forever! (That can be so hard to remember.)
wow.
ReplyDeletei had noooooooo idea i had such an impact on you. im glad to know it was positive, though. i havent been on blogger in a long while, so i totally missed this post. its been maybe about a week, perhaps a bit longer. i miss your blog, and your comments, and you.
youve got me thinking, so check back soon, for im sure ill have a post dedicated to you very soon.
hang in there, you really are much stronger than you think <3