Dear World,

Dear world,
I'm sorry I thought I could take you on, I was wrong.
Please forgive me,
Heather

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I'm trying to read but I can't see the words. I can't concentrate, even with multi coloured highlighters.
I ate a pack of biscuits and I want tea.
I poured an entire cup of coffee over my desk and now my room smells bad.
30 pages is too many.
Things that have to be done this week:

1. Making dinner for boys
2. Reading and tutorial sheet for religion
3. Setting out a research plan and writing an introduction and emailing it to my tutor
4. Asking people to write references and mailing them
5. Go to class
6. Get a present for the parents
7. Get a present for the boy

Things that I should do:

1. Reading for this weeks lectures
2. Reading for last weeks lectures
3. Start writing essays
4. Go to the gym
5. Set up a facebook group for action group
6. Set up an action group meeting

It doesn't look like many things, but it will take many hours I do not have.
I constantly feel like I'm letting people down.
A month ago when CoSY sent us the mental health survey, I aced it. Today I got 63 when 54+ is severe.
The boy is scared. But what about me? I don't want to be scared because I don't want to give in to it.
I spend every spare minute thinking about suicide and si. Of course I'm scared.
new days keep dawning
yet still night's falling.
sometimes its hard to believe
I'm not meant to leave